I've recently separated from a 10 year relationship. It's definatley done, but I don't know how to move on? It's been so long I don't know what to say to guys when they say things to me, and I'm actually nervous as hell when i think of sex! Literally feel like a nervous virgin again! Help!
5 Replies
If you have recently separated, may be sex and and relationships need to take a bit more time? Heal yourself, get some counselling and just be for a little bit. Look after your own mental and physical wellbeing.
It takes time. Give yourself time to emotionally and physically adjust before trying to talk to guys.
Omg, don't even think about that right now. You're recently single and due to Covid it wouldn't be entirely safe to meet people anyway. Just focus on you!
When I seperate with my ex I was very lucky to find a new relationship in the unlikely of places when I wasn’t looking for one. 4 years later we’re still together.
My ex on the other hand jumped straight onto dating sites, had a new girl a week later and....... we’re now up to about the 10-11th girlfriend. None last very long and I suspect it’s because he didn’t allow himself the time and space he needed to heal and reconnect with himself after we spilt.
Give yourself some time, and then a little more if you have kids. If you’re nervous as hell chances are you’re not quite ready to look for a new relationship just yet.
It’s okay to be alone xx
Advice from my psychologist - allow 1 month for every year you've been with someone, in order to fully move on. So for you, atleast 10 months. Focus on yourself during this time especially if the thought of other men make you feel uncomfortable. That's a sign your not quite ready and have more work to do :) There's no rush xx