How do I leave him. Together 16 years married 11. I feel ive fallen out of love kids 10 and 5. I am unhappy and feel I have more to life. I just dont know how to take that first step. I have a full time job but he brings in the main income and says that he wont give me a cent. Will I be ok? I cant stay ive had enough more to the story but just given basics. Im scared to leave
5 Replies
Ive recently left. Best decision ever!
Im happy, kids are happy. Life is so much brighter away from a toxic relationship.
Is there DV?
No to DV but he is an alcoholic bit functional alcoholic
Just go through CSA and make a claim on child support every year he doesn’t pay when he does his taxes you’ll receive his tax return, if he chooses not to do his tax returns until after they are 18 then guess what just leave your claim open and you’ll receive it when he finally does it. Get good legal representation and do a financial settlement. This whole I won’t give you a cent bullshit is just that “BULLSHIT” don’t go for anything too extreme just what your entitled to. If he continues to be a dickhead go for more. Look around for a good lawyer and do it quickly xx
He can’t stop you going for child support. If he doesn’t pay it will come out of his tax return anyway. Because it’s a debt. And seriously, he is just trying to scare you. Making you feel like you can’t live without him. But you pretty much have already been doing it alone anyway right? I think you need to just bite the bullet and do it. You have a full time job you will be okay.
I did this 5 years ago, hardest conversations I ever hard. First time he told me I was allowed to leave and threatened he had nothing to live for, I stayed out of pity for another 4 mths and then had the conversation again. (Both nights he was drunk but that’s because he was drunk 4/5 nights a week)
He refused to pay child support claiming that because we did 50/50 custody that we should pay our own way. He kept just about everything (house/boat/90% of furniture)and I left with minimal stuff.
Everything I have now is all mine, I won’t ever let anyone have that control over me again.
5 years on and he is still extremely bitter and bags me out to the kids every week he has them. But fortunately the kids know he is a negative person who often makes stories up as he goes.