Why me.... why can’t I be happy

Hi all not sure where to start my husband when good is the best but when he gets angry he just keeps everything going, he goes through mine and my daughters phone he brings up the past all the time, he tries to catch us on a lie. Not sure why he does this I have never done anything to betray his trust ( he has to me before) tells me to get over it. I know I am not perfect by all means but he keeps saying that I don’t give him enough sex, I don’t spend enough time with him. I like to be on my own a bit I deal with people all day at work so have some “ out” time I feel I need, he will say I don’t watch movies with him and our daughter but I have to watch what they want I never get asked hey do you want to pick a movie. I will be in our room watching something he would of been in man cave for hours and he will come in turn his phone up and i then can’t hear what I was watching. He calls me names anywhere everywhere we could be at the shops and I say something and it’s like your such a fuck head you know that and he will go on and on about it then up comes the past again. He calls our son a dumb C if he can’t get some right first time, he said he is over being around dumb people in our house. ( he has a learning disorder and our son is the same) I always wonder if he puts us down to make him feel better. I hate me now I hate who I have become, I look at others life and they are happy they have nice things I want nice things but he spends money on other stuff. We earn good money but we can’t even buy a house. I want to be successful but I feel he holds me back just because if I became successful he is “ left” behind. I feel like all my life I have made the wrong choose and someone is punishing me.