I’m feeling so lost and unsure what the first step is...
I’ve been with my partner for over 10 years and we have split twice, each time I end up in a new relationship really early on and when I get burnt by the guy I run back to fake promises of security from my partner... we have 2 kids together so I’m aware I’m teaching them terrible habits.. I know I’m doing the wrong thing, he says the right thing at the time but it’s only short lived... I know this time I need to leave for me and no one else and to make it stick I just don’t know how? Please mummas help me.
4 Replies
You need to learn to be happy being single. When you break up with him, don’t start dating for at least a year. Learn to be single. Create a life for yourself. Write down somewhere all the reasons your ex isn’t good for you.
Find a safety and support network that’s not your ex. Confide in friends.
You stop jumping from one bad relationship back to the first bad one. Learn to be happy single and set yourself up without relying on a man in your bed to make life okay. Nothing will change for you until you can learn to stand on your own two feet
When you separate, dont plan to leave and have a new guy waiting. I knew someone like that, only she was cheating before kicking her husband out and when the new man didn't work out, she ran back home. Making false promises and demanding that he do it too, when in fact it was her that shouldn't have created chaos in the first place.
That doesn't seem like you but the pattern you follow is you're single, lonely, need someone to depend on, so you get into an intense relationship very quickly, that goes south after maybe 3 months and then you're left alone, yes? Maybe?
When you're freshly single, it's time to heal and not fill that void. So next time, don't try to fill it because really you should gain some self esteem and self confidence. That takes time and support from people you actually can count on. Friends, family... not a guy who you think is the answer and seems like a good idea at the time.
Be strong. Be brave. Be fearless but be smart. X
The longer your relationship is that you're leaving should mean the longer you stay single before starting another one! Keep focused and make it your goal to stay single for at least a year! Just avoid being in situations where you meet new people, lock yourself in your house and turn the Internet off 😂