Hi ladies, I have 4 kids including a 10 month baby. Since having the baby, I don’t ever want to have sex. I do not feel horny at all. Ever. I sometimes do it just to make my husband happy but I hate it the whole time we are doing it, to the point that I can’t even pretend that I like it. My husband notices how much I don’t like it and it’s upsetting him too. I don’t know what is wrong with me because before I had the baby I had a normal sex life. It’s not that I’m unattracted to my husband because I do not feel sexually about males in general now. Has this happened to any of you? HELP! Thank you 🙏
10 Replies
Maybe it’s time to get your hormone levels checked? Talk to your GP
What does that involve? And what can they do if something is out of order? Like the poster my sex drive is completely gone too. Could it be as easy as a trip to the Drs ?
What contraception are you taking
I feel the exact same. I have 3 kids, oldest is almost 8 & youngest is 1.5yrs old. I don’t feel attracted to other men either. I just don’t want sex, ever. And just like you I do it to keep him happy but he also notices it & yesterday actually asked why I don’t want it. I couldn’t find an answer apart from ‘I just don’t’. I’m still breastfeeding & have the implanon. Maybe the hormones in my birth control are messing it all up. For our relationships sake I wish I had my drive back, it’s been gone for so long.
Yes I would definitely get hormones checked by gp.
I feel exactly the same and have since my first child was born nearly 5 years ago. I’ve pregnant with #3 atm but I actually have to force myself to have sex for his sake. I don’t become aroused after all, before or during and he has tried so hard to set the mood and tone to make it nicer for me. It certainly upsets him that he knows I no longer enjoy it. I simply don’t feel anything at all, no sensation. I had complications post birth with my daughter with an episiotomy wound splitting and becoming severely infected and recovery took a long time. I’ve always wondered if nerves were damaged or something. I know I need to go to the doctor but I feel so awkward talking about it.
I'd be heading to the GP for a blood test.
I had surgery and for a solid 5/6 months just the touch of my husband made my skin crawl and it made him feel so bad. It didn't make me feel bad, it made me feel angry. I googled to see if something was wrong with me. Turned out that after a big shock to your body, your hormones get thrown out of whack and it takes a bit to get back into rhythm. I'm a year post op and still a little out of whack, although emotions are back to normal and I feel bad for not enjoying my husbands touch as much as I used too. I wish I was back to normal, but needed the surgery so I couldn't change it if I could.
I’ve had this problem for years. It’s really difficult & I feel terrible constantly for my husband who feels like he’s not wanted. He is very understanding but of course he still has feelings of being unwanted too.
I have 3 kids. My youngest is 5. I thought for sure by now it would have improved. I’ve had my hormone levels tested a lot & found out I have pelvic congestion syndrome which isn’t helping. But I think the biggest culprit has been my antidepressants. I’m on a high dose & they stuff with everything.
My husband is very supportive & I do try my best but I’ve learnt too that you shouldn’t have to just give in either.
I didn't like it either because everything hurt and it felt weird for along time. Ease back into it and maybe explore your own body a bit.
First, see a GP get blood taken and do a mental health check; make sure you are not suffering from depression. It doesn't have to postnatal I suffered from what was termed as a reactionary depression. The more pressure you put on yourself, the worse it becomes. You feel guilty for feeling this way, and more is heaped on top of you because your Hubby is upset. Then add the kid's needs... Please get checked out and possibly consider counselling as well.