A few years back I wrote on this forum about my partner who was filming me while showering and undressing and keeping it with his pornography. The reaction was huge, with so many people telling me to leave and press charges. In the end I didn’t. Throughout that 8 years of ‘relationship’ I was in an emotionally, mentally, financially and sexually abusive relationship. I was in denial and didn’t have the family support I so very much so needed. Just one friend that could see what was happening. Jump to May this year I had a breakdown.. I tried to commit suicide twice and ended up in a psychiatric unit for 5 weeks. I’ve now left that relationship, have an avo and have been connected to all the right services I didn’t know existed. Eg. Orange door. I now have been diagnosed with complex ptsd, Stockholm syndrome, generalised anxiety and major depressive disorder. This man nearly took me away from my children, family and friends and I look back now and can see with so much clarity what I’ve been exposed to. Please if you are being abused in anyway I know how hard it is to reach out for help but please do it. If you see a friend struggling let them know you’re there for them and let them know of services available to help. I’m so happy I’m alive, I now have full family support and feel like I’m starting to slowly move on with me life. To all the other women suffering abuse, you’re not alone. I feel you.
4 Replies
I’m so sorry you went through that. Congratulations on getting to where you are now.
I'm so glad you left and have come through to the other side, how sad it took a few suicide attempts to do it. I was stuck in an abusive relationship for 13 years and nobody knew except for neighbours that turned a blind eye. All of my family lived interstate so we hardly saw them and when we did see them he was nice as pie. He has strangled, punched, pushed, raped, verbally abused, mentally abused and financially abused me. His family were aware of some of it but it was always my fault somehow. I now report screaming from neighbours, I don't care if people think I'm being a busy body, if it helps someone to get out of a hell hole then I will keep doing it. I have been "free" for 7 years and it's awesome. I'm still affected though, I have been with someone for 3 years and I will have panic attacks if I do something that used to make my ex go psycho, like a guy liking my profile pic or spending too much on food shopping. Even though it's my money 😂. I just wait for him to lose it with me but he never has. It's a long road to be able to trust a man again. I wish you all the best, keep spreading your story.
I am in the process of leaving one too , the constant put downs the degrading the blaming and shaming the you always make issues yet he takes nonresponsivibility , cheating lying isolation and put downs of your a crap mother is aweful ! These are horrible abusers it really is so hard to leave when they box you in and leave you with nothing not even your self worth , I hope to be free one day too because my ex stripped me of everything it's unfair hard but it's good to see a way out
Kelly here from The Imperfect Mum team - and I've just finished scheduling questions for the week (this is going up on facebook on Saturday at 4pm if you're interested)
Also just wanted to take the time to write to you and say thank you.
What a champion you are. Brings tears to my eyes.
Hearing of the mums out there who didn't make it and die to domestic violence - I'm so so thankful to hear a positive testimony. Appreciate you taking the time to write in.
And now you're encouraging others in their difficulties too. Wow.
You are totally rockin' this survivor stuff! Well done!
Thanks again for making my day. This post is the BEST!
xKelly