To move or not to move?
For about two years now my husband and I have been weighing up the pros and cons of a move for our family. We currently live in a small coastal town and have done so for the past 7 years. Our kids are settled, heck even we are. My husband has been in the same job for 7 years and the pay is pretty good, I was unable to find work (there is virtually no work in this town) but managed to build up a business from home which has really grown in the last two years to where we can rely on it for a second income. However neither of us can get out of heads that we want to move back to Brisbane. We met in Brisbane and lived there for a year before moving overseas, when we came back to Australia we had always planned on settling there but you throw family and a pregnancy in the mix, we ended up staying put.
Two years ago we discussed moving back and had started saving for our new lives.. I fell pregnant (unplanned) and had a pretty traumatic ectopic which put a complete standstill on our plans. Fast forward to a year later and we are discussing it again.
We are leaning more towards going than staying as the pros far outweigh the cons but this little voice in both our heads say “what if it’s a bad move for us?” “What if we hate it?” We would be giving up a lot to move BUT if it works out we would be in a much better position. We moved from England 7 years ago and that was an easy decision because we were miserable there.. this time around it’s different.
Moving would upset a lot of people and I guess that plays on our minds, but we see what our lives could be like with a move to a bigger city and want more opportunities for ourselves (especially our children) I feel like I’ve done all I can here and I’ve outgrown it and crave for more.
Has anyone been in a similar position and moved and regretted it or moved and it was the best decision they ever made?
4 Replies
I could have written this myself. I am so unhappy in the town I currently live in but because we have family here and our children are settled in school and friendships, the decision to move has been a tough one. I know I want to move. I love the city and everything it has to offer but the voice in the back of head keeps saying ‘what if?’. What if I uproot our kids and jobs and we hate it. I do also look at it from the other side and ask myself what if we love it. I have no answer for you other than to maybe think if when you are 70 and looking back on your life, would this be a regret? I know for me it would be which is why we are in the process of making the move
We have just done it in December and don’t regret it. A change is so good for everyone. Yes I miss their school and they miss their friends but the kids have also made so many new friends and have experienced so many different opportunities. I say go for it else you will look back and regret it.
I understand, but I've been in the opposite position. We live in the busy Gold Coast and fantasize about moving to a smaller town where life is simpler and cheaper. The reality is though, that everything we need is here and our kids are very settled. We also have a village of support somewhat nearby.
We decided to buy a camper and do more family trips away, to give us that sense of the simple life, away from the busyness of home and work. We don't go far, only an hour or so, but it's enough to feel like we've had a break and reset ourselves. You might benefit from the same, instead the occasional 'city break' to Brissy.
One thing we also realised is we were comparing life in the country without kids, to life in the suburbs with kids. Even if we moved somewhere quieter, life would still be hectic!!
Deep down you both want to go so just do it. If you didn’t really want to you wouldn’t be questioning it.