Hi ladies, my 3 and a half year old is refusing to say sorry. She'll try and distract the person she's hurt by showing/giving them something or changing the subject, but she will point blank refuse to say the words "I'm sorry". It's starting to cause an issue at daycare because she'll throw a huge tantrum rather than saying two simple words to apologise to someone she's hurt. What's going on?!
2 Replies
My son (4) is the same. I think it's about control. Saying sorry is like admitting they were wrong, & that's not something a lot of people find easy to do, especially kids with their stubborn little minds. If my son is adamant that he didn't do anything wrong, he won't say sorry, because he isn't sorry. I ask my son 'was it very nice what you just did to your sister? She loves you & wouldn't do that to you. Would you like it if she did that to you?' & when he says no, I tell him 'if you wouldn't like it, then it mustn't be nice, so you need to tell her you are sorry'. It seems to work even though his version of sorry is very mumbled & with his eyes glued to the floor, haha, he's just stubborn. Good luck!
Couldnt giving something be an act of apology? Is that good enough? Say what you did wrong, how it wasnt nice, Give her a cuddle? Its probably a better life skill to have... Not many people actually say im sorry.
My 2 yr old wont say thank you, refuses, so i tell her its rude you have to be nice or people don't have to give you things, so now shes chosen to say please. Apparently still too shy to say thank you. Good enough for me!