I’m going to try & keep this as short as I can...
Both my parents separated & divorced when I was very young, both re married & had children from previous marriages. I had a wonderful relationship with my parents. I got along well with my step dad (and still do) my step mother & I haven’t always got along very well, in all honesty I think we only tolerated each other because of my dad & because of the love he had for me & my kids.
My dad passed away in 2015 after a long battle with cancer. Ever since his passing she has made no effort with me or my kids, I understand she’s grieving but I just feel she only has time for her children & grand children. When my dad was still alive he was the one always making the effort to come & see us. I have tried so hard to be there for her, but she is always making excuses. Apparently I was named in my dads will & she told me that I will get something when she passes?
Now what I want to know is, that my dad left everything to her in is will, what’s to stop her from changing her will so that I’m left with nothing? Do I have any right to ask to see his will?
She has made no effort to contact me whatsoever just even to ask how I am or how the kids are. I usually send her school photos & Santa photos every year. But last year I didn’t as I’m so tired of doing all the chasing.
My mum unexpectedly passed away in 2017 & I was absolutely devastated, it’s still taking a long time to come to terms with losing both my parents in such a short space of time. My step mother couldn’t care less, I rang her & told her & she gave me her deepest condolences & that’s it, barely a word since then...
I really don’t know what to do anymore?
7 Replies
Get legal advice, stop bothering with her.
She’s not obligated to stay in touch with you or your family , nor obligated to disclose the Will details etc ... as his wife she doesn’t have to do anything for or with you . I know it’s probably painful for you, but she isn’t your mother . Stop trying to communicate with her and definitely go see a lawyer if you can afford to regarding the will .
Your dad passed in 2015 and you haven’t seen the will? Very odd, why would you leave it that long? In Victoria there is a time restriction on contesting wills, I’m pretty sure it is way too late now for any state. I would seek legal counsel. If they say it is too late, I would ask her what she meant by your dad leaving you something. In terms of your relationship, forget her, you yourself said you only tolerated each other when your dad was alive, so why bother now?
I’m pretty sure you only have 12 months to contest a Will.
Unfortunately I think it’s one of those things you just have to let go!
Depends on your state but step children can contest wills. You probably should have done it when your Dad passed away, I think its too late now so you will have to contest hers when she passes. It won't hurt to get legal advice on this situation to make sure you can't claim it now and go through steps needed for the future if you're going to contest her will.
If the two of you were never really close and only tolerated each other because of your father then I’m not sure why you would want a relationship with her now that he is gone? She isn’t your family and you and your children are not hers. I thought you only had 12 months to contest a Will after the passing. You may have lost your chance with that one and contest her will when she passes.
I think I follow... my dad and his ( 3rd ) wife did their wills together. He knew he would die first and wanted to make sure his wife wasnt left homeless- but we were taken care of in long term. He left all assets to her, & her will left everything to his kids (she has none of her own). As soon as he died she changed her will (it's all going to her sister and neices) and stopped contacting us. He had all his assets when they met. It's so wrong- but there's nothing we can do right now. A lawyer suggested that i continue to document attempts to remain in contact with her, as this would help if I challenged it when she died. Good luck. Sometimes life isnt fair, but you can't dwell on it.