My Daughters in year 7 and there is this girl in her friendship group who makes her life hell ! At the moment she’s got year 8 girls involved and she’s telling them my daughter is bullying her ( it’s just not happening) so there intimidating her ! She then gets the other friends to go on her side leaving my daughter by herself ! They do the same sport 4 afternoons a week and if she wants she’ll just not talk to my daughter there and just give her filthy looks . She’s so up and down with her and it makes my daughter so unsure ! There’s been a long history of this behaviour and this girls mother has also said some awful things and gives my daughter filthy looks ! She’s so mean and it’s just breaking my daughters spirt ! I don’t know what to do she’s not wanting to go to school !
4 Replies
Girls are horrible! Can't believe the mother is getting in on it too. Ask for a meeting at school to get some clarity with the whole thing. Its not netball is it? Either way bring it up with management.
Ugh... There's always one in every group, my daughter has already encountered a few of "those girls" and she's only 9...
Bring it up with the coach/management of the club, most definitely - unacceptable to say the least!
If this is happening at school too, bring it up with them too.
Nip it in the bud now!
I'd encourage your daughter to find new friends though, if this one girl has swayed the whole group, none of these girls are worth being friends with. Time to expand her social circle and move away from shitty friends!
If you notice the mother being bitch at sport, call her out on it. From my experiences and observations I've noticed that bitches get away with being bitches because no one pulls them up on it. They are usually not so brave when someone questions their behaviour, do it calmly and politely too, it makes you look better:
"Hey Tina, is there a reason you're upset with my daughter? She said you keep giving her dirty looks and (insert specifics here) and she doesn't know why, I'm just wondering if you have a valid reason for trying to intimidate a 13 year old girl?".
Bet that shit stops quick smart!
Tell your daughter that ostracising 1 person is a tactic she uses to hold onto 'power' and that people who do this pick the person that they think won't fight back. Reinforce that means she's actually recognising that your daughter is soft hearted. But... This behaviour is usually learned from parents and /or a reflection of that person's own low self esteem so if the other girls in the group aren't strong enough to stand up to her, then she should find some people to hang out with that aren't caught up in power plays. It's sooooo hard. I was in your daughter's shoes. I wish I could go back because I would put an end to it quick smart these days. Maybe let your daughter read some of these responses xx
I’d be talking to the school/teacher about it. And giving your daughter some ways to cope.
It’s not always a bad thing when your child is being bullied. It’s the perfect opportunity to educate them on this kind of stuff and reinforce why they should never be a bully themselves (because they know how it feels).
Teach her how to stand up for herself, not by her come backs, but by moving onto something else and having a strong enough mind to push past the hurt this girl is trying to enforce on her. Teach her that what she says, says more about the bully then it does the victim.