I would love for you all to weigh in on a discussion I am having with my husband. He doesn't believe it is normal to co sleep with an 18 month old. All his friend's babies sleep in cots. I still night breast feed and work full time. Co sleeping to me is logical. And I like it. But I want unbiased opinions so I can discuss this further with husband. (I thought about smothering said husband in his sleep but my next best option was to ask the sisterhood 😂😂😂)
16 Replies
My husband and I co sleep with our 3yo, although not every night, usually when she’s cranky or not feeling well. Otherwise she sleeps in a toddler bed in our room. She’s always been in our room since day one, and we both prefer her there. Luckily she sleeps through without any issue and doesn’t wake until 8am.
Although every now and then it would be nice to have the room to ourselves, we figure she won’t always want to sleep with us so we take advantage of it when we can.
The whole comparing to other babies thing drives me crazy, every single child is different, everyone parents different and you do exactly what works for you, and if that means co-sleeping then you do that 😊 as for your husband, he needs to compromise and stop comparing your babe to what others are doing.
Good luck mumma! I’m on your side 😂
I think it depends on your circumstances. I have a 9yo with ADHD who has massive sleeping issues (and has done since birth). We’re doing everything as the specialists suggest but some nights it’s just too hard (I have Fibromyalgia) and she’s in my bed and I don’t even realise. Or if I keep trying to send her back to her room, I end out falls ng asleep on her floor. The sleep specialist says that technically humans are meant to sleep in a pack but I know I sleep worse with her in my bed! Each to your own. Always do what works for you.
Yes i do. Until theyre ready to sleep alone as i would prefer not to get up in the night.
Make a spare room for you and hubby or put bub in a toddler bed for a while, your time is important and so is both of your sleep, but mostly they would bedshare.
I'm neither for or against it personally, but I firmly believe (when it comes to sleep) that you do whatever you've gotta do so that mum, dad and baby are as well rested as possible - that might mean Co sleeping, controlled crying or playing musical beds and it also means compromising, it's got to work for you both!
There's no such thing as 'normal' especially at 18 months, my advice to your hubby is to stop comparing your baby to his friends babies. He doesn't want to fall into the habit of doing that, it'll drive him insane.
I didn’t enjoy co-sleeping one little bit. My baby slept in a bassinet next to the bed. Once he was 6 months old he went into the cot in the other room.
I found I slept better and my son slept better in his own bed. I also found me not being next to him he wasn’t looking for the boob every 5 minutes.
Keeping my bed for me and my partner was really important to me too. I found intimacy increased and felt closer to my partner. It replenished my partner bucket that so often gets neglected when kids come on the scene.
The only time we co slept was when my son was sick but that still was a mattress next to rather than in the bed.
Agree here
I have co slept when I was a single mum and I had space in for the bed my child also never slept so it was the only way it worked for us. In a relationship with a new baby, we sleep naked we don't co sleep. I will covnap though 😂
Personally I never really liked to. I am very much a person who needs her personal space and I felt like sleep was sometimes the only time I could get that when they were newborns and I am very routine orientated and I set up routines for the kids early on so that they knew where they slept.
Not to say there were periods of time when they would come into our bed if they were going for a leap, teething ect
I breast fed both mine too, but they stopped night feeds (sept through) around 4 months old, give or take a bit. BUT I had a year mat-leave so I never had to get up for work if I’d been up resettling babies in their beds 500x in one night.
I can completely understand why it suits some families and given we had a king size bed, I probably could actually do it. Or given I had kids who continued night feeds or night wakings beyond 4 months I maybe would have.
My son asks why the brave adults get to sleep together but the children are left alone. Makes sense when you think about it like that... I'm a big girl and I feel vulnerable if hubby is away lol. On a practical note, working full time and still breast feeding overnight? Cosleeping means you actually get sleep and function at work. Kind of important. Oh... And my son weaned in 4 days. My daughter took 6 months (and I didn't start trying until she was 1). It was a nightmare. So if your daughter isn't ready to wean just yet, roll with it. You're doing good by her.
Even if I go to bed with just hubby I wake up with both kids in here too lol. 7 and 4. They feel safe when we're together.
My 2 youngest are 7 & 10. They still often crawl into my bed. I’ve always started them out in their own beds, but when they woke they were in mine. Always.
Now when they’re scared they’re in mine. When they’re unwell, they’re in mine. When life just isn’t going right they know they always have that one place that makes everything better.
My 2 big ones at 13 & 16 still climb in when life is crap.
We don’t sleep alone, why should our children?
(I’m a single parent, I usually do sleep alone lol, but my kids like the security as much as most adults do, so why not allow it)
I prefer to sleep alone. It’s heavenly
I find I sleep worse with bubby (11 months) in bed. I did love having her snuggled up to me though but now she hates sleeping with me 😞
We don't. When my husband told me he needed space where it is just us, where I am his partner and not just mum - I listened. The kids come in in the mornings for a snuggle but none of them have ever co-slept in our bed
I didn't bed share to begin with, but when my LOs sleep went to shit at around 6 months old, we ended up bringing her into our bed and, at nearly 7 years of age, I sleep with her in her room most nights. My husband sleeps in our room on his own. She sleeps well but likes to chat with me before bed and it works well for her to debrief before bed. Also my hubs is a very light sleeper and I snore. My daughter could sleep through a tornado. Haha.
I co-sleep still with my 5year old! have done since he was maybe 3 months old. I don't know why we still do, it's just normal now. I have encorouged him to go into his own room, he has a cool room. but he just doesn't want to yet. and it's ok with me