Hi, my two year old daughter has been going to daycare every Monday for the last nine months and has always gotten extremely upset when I drop her off. I understand this is very normal but she doesn't seem to enjoy herself during the day. She will attach herself to a teacher and won't leave their side the whole time, if the teacher leaves or has a break she will have a meltdown. When I pick her up I can see the utter relief on her face as she runs to me and holds on to me for dear life. I recently took the advice of the daycare and we are trying a second day (Wednesday) to see if this will improve the situation. Today was the first week of her going to daycare a second time in the week and she just lost it when we left, it was awful. When I picked her up her eyes were red and puffy and I could see she had been crying a lot. She was also sitting on the teachers knee and not interacting with the other kids. So I am really confused at what I should do. Should I keep going with the two days or just stick to the one day? My parents are happy to have her on the Wednesday but I thought going to daycare two days a week would help with her separation anxiety. Its really upsetting me atm. Has anyone else had this problem?
4 Replies
Usually kids have enough confidence that mum will come back. I'd be asking myself 1. Is she like this if she is looked after by adults with no kids? 2. Or is she like this when left with anyone full stop? 3. Does she play with other kids while you are around in any location? 4. Is she clingy with you at home?. You might need to take some baby steps to help her with that anxiety depending on answers.
Perhaps she doesn't like the day care. I took my son to a daycare to have a look and he refused to get out of my arms, wouldn't talk just hated it. The staff also seemed to be not very happy and the place just felt very down and sad. I then took him to another local daycare and he loved it, staff where happy kids happy and his very happy to go. Sometimes kids can pick up on feelings and vibes perhaps she's picking up on that in the daycare or from you when u go to drop her off. Try to be upbeat and happy and exited about her going, easier said than done when they a clutching at you crying I know.
Sorry after 9 months of crying her entire day at daycare, she is to ready for it. Take her out and try again in a year or even a different daycare. If your child cries all day the teachers should be giving you a call to tell you she has not settled. And you should go pick her up. All this crying is not worth a day in daycare. You are basically paying for your daughter to cry all day.
The anonymous posts are insightful and confronting. I agree with the first entry of finding what the cause is.
The 'you're paying for her to cry all day' is harsh but true also.
If you have no choice but to have her cared for for 2 days a week, ask her grandparents for an extra day or enrol her in family care.
For whatever reason she is unhappy there (too young, unsettled domestic environment, seperation anxiety or something else you will need time to get to the bottom of). Make a change straight away. You will both be happier for it.