During summer holidays my child (8) had a slumber party with a school friend, a few other kids were invited too.
My kid never divulges much about anything but seemed more reluctant than usual to discuss things but I didn't think much of it at the time.
After schools been back and having spoken to other parents of kids at said slumber party a few of the details have come out.
A few of these details are questionable judgment on the hosting parents part, the one that's concerns me most is apparently this parent was drinking all night (one child told their parents it was over 1 bottle of wine as they saw said hosting parent open second bottle).
I know this is second hand information at this point most likely coming from the kids but given the other details having overindulged on alcohol would make sense.
I also asked my child about it, I got a few non committal shrugs and 'I dunno's but I could tell by the look on their face there was some truth to what I was asking.
So, is it acceptable to drink whilst you have other people's kids in your care, especially overnight or am I right to be a bit pissed off? I just kind of always assumed that it's not something you should do.
Do I bring this up with the parent in case this has all been misconstrued and blown out of proportion? I've actually been acquainted with this person since before we had kids and have been friendly with since the kids have come along, I thought I knew their lifestyle and parenting pretty well but admittedly probably not well enough given this info.
The other parents are still furious yet none have bothered to talk to the parent about it either.
Or do I not bring it up and just not allow slumber parties there anymore? And how do I decline the next invite without bringing it up?
EDIT: the other details on their own probably aren't too alarming, just wanted to add them for more relevance.
. They watched some inappropriate stuff on YouTube (think Peppa pig with machine guns and a frozen parody called 'I'm a Ho')
.The listened to some explicit music, Some of Eminem's older stuff to be specific.
.Bed time wasn't enforced, they were apparently up til 3-4 am eating junk (would certainly explain the tummy ache kiddo came home with).
.The kids were basically allowed to do as they pleased.
.There are a few more instances I can't go into without getting specific but from the little information i got from my kid, supervision was basically non existent.
I really just want to know the truth as my child has slept over there about 4 times before, though I know I'm not likely to get it I feel I do need to give this parent the opportunity to give their side.
Any thoughts?
7 Replies
You probably won't know the full story, kids can change things up and I doubt the parent will be fully honest about it.
I'd take it as a hard lesson learned and not send your kid to that person's home again for a sleepover.
I wouldn't drink beyond legally driving if I had a school friend over. My son had a sleep over last year and came home with little sleep and a tummy ache. I figured that was part of the risk of putting excited kids together but haven't had another one as it was too much. Wasn't upset at the parent though. Re YouTube, I would tend to suggest they were watching something appropriate and it flicked over to that. We had it happen to us a few times until we banned you tube.
I'm the Mum that locks myself away and lets them run feral😂 "Drinking all night" could be 3 drinks over 6 hours or 10 drinks over 2 hours. Is your child alive? Did she have fun? Must have been a good sleepover.
This sounds like all the sleep overs I attended as a kid lol
Staying up until after midnight when I was a kid having a sleep over was the norm. It was like that at my place, and like that at my friends places. I don't send a kid to a sleep over expecting them to actually get a good night sleep and not be shitty the next day. It's why we only allow sleepovers on Friday and Saturday nights.
The drinking. A one or two standard drinks, no worries, I wouldn't be concerned. Drunk I'd have a huge problem with.
Don't confront them. You have no idea if they were drunk or had two drinks really. But if you don't trust them don't send your kids back there.
For me this isn’t acceptable, I wouldn’t confront the parent, I doubt they would own up to it. I personally would refuse anymore sleep overs. Better be safe then sorry and it’s a bad example for your child. I have seen minor accidents happen to my child when family members were intoxicated playing with my child. What has your child got to lose if they stop going there? I am sure there are other friends your child has that has parents that are more trustworthy
A bunch of eight year olds left to their own devices? Um no thank you!
Ask your kid if they felt safe at all times, if they were happy with unrestricted viewing and access to unlimited junk food and if they were happy staying awake long past bedtime?
I know my kids wouldn’t be happy with any of that, including the parent drinking alcohol.
If you have concerns, speak directly to the parent/your supposed friend
I spoke to a parent once, when no one else had the guts to, she was an alcoholic and I said I didn’t want her driving my child. I hope to goodness she sought professional help.