I had my first child nearly six months ago, immedintly after my waters broke I was rushed to an emergency Caesarian. The whole ordeal was highly traumatic for everyone involved (including drs)
I'm just wondering people who have experienced traumatic births how did it take for you to decide you wanted more children? Did you keep all your first child's stuff or was the age gap big enough to require all new things like bottles ect. I know six months is still young but I am pretty confident I'm done.
7 Replies
I had a traumatic birth. I was in no hurry to repeat it. I held on to a few special outfits etc but gave everything else away. I didn't do anything permanent contraception wise until much later.
I had a very traumatic first birth aswell and developed severe pnd and anxiety, I just found it really tough to recover. I was the same as you and was sure we would just have the 1 baby. It took me about 16 months to get to a point where I was able to think about another baby and fell pregnant when my first wad 18 months! My second birth was very straight forward compared to first! So please just allow yourself time, your bub is still very young, be kind to yourself. You need time to heal, and if you only have 1 then that is totally fine! Xx
Just give it time, my first was very traumatic 21 hrs labour resulting in emergency section recovery took forever at least 12 mths. The age gap between first and second is 3 yrs, I saved all my baby things from the first as I wasn't sure what I wanted to do. Just give it time to recover
I had a very traumatic birth with my first, baby and I both almost died and if it wasn't for a very quick thinking doctor I definitely wouldn't be here today. It resulted in an emergency c-section after 24.5 hours of labouring that went horribly horribly wrong. I just gave birth to my second child via a scheduled c-section three weeks ago, and I can tell you the experience was completely different. The age gap between my two is 21 months apart, so we fell pregnant when my first was 13 months old. I actually felt ready when he was only 6 months old, but I did have counselling from when he was born because of the nature of his birth. I honestly suggest counselling before you decide whether you want another child or not as it really helped me heal and move past the horrors. And I don't regret having a second child one bit. There is a Facebook page called "Birth Trauma Australia - Held" that has counselling services in certain areas, and can also provide a lot of advice and information. All the best xx
I Had a terrible birth with my only child. Waters had to be broken, 48 hours of labour.. 4 years on and I am still confident I don't want any more. When you know, you know. I am happy with my son only :)
Even without a traumatic birth experience it takes time to feel ready for another baby.. I usually start thinking about it after 12 months, actually feel ready once the older bub is closer to 18 months old. Every birth is different, your second won't be a repeat of your first but if absolutely necessary you could make decisions that might help you feel more comfortable closer to the time... Don't do anything rash yet. In time you'll know if you are truly done, & if you're really prepared not to give your first child a sibling... All the best :)
My first labour was very traumatic and resulted in an emergency Caesar also and for a long long time I just couldn't imagine putting myself through that again. My daughter is now almost 4 and I have just had my second daughter 3 weeks ago.
For reasons I had to have another Caesarian which I wasn't happy about but we booked it in 2 weeks before I was due so it was all a very smooth experience. I'm so happy I went again as it was a wonderful experience and was very healing in a way. Don't put pressure on yourself now, enjoy your new baby and see how you feel in time. Goodluck in whatever you choose to do x