Hi hun would you please post on my behalf to your amazing group of mums?
My partner has a 10yr old daughter from a previous relationship. My partner has never been able to get legal rights as a father, as the mother had another man sign the birth cert without my partners knowledge, until we got a cope of the birth cert and saw that he wasn't on the cert. Now the man that is on the cert has never been in the picture, my partner has always given his daughter all his attention when the mother has allowed us to have her. A fes years ago, the mother was going through a rough patch and we took on his daughter full time, which was all fine until we asked to have the birth cert sorted and some sort of payment assistance, then she ripped the daughter away from us for 2yrs and we didn't hear, see or speak to either of them, until 6months ago, we got a call from the mother asking us to have the daughter as she was in hospital with her other child. Of course we obliged, and went and picked his girl up. When we got her she had boys clothes on, hair was a mess, hadn't showered and she still had the same shoes we had bought her 2yrs earlier.
My heart broke, when we saw her. Such a beautiful girl, hidden in such a mess.
Now this time with his daughter we want to get a test done and the birth cert sorted so we can have more rights to this poor girl, and give her the love and attention she is so desperately longing for. She wouldn't let go of us when we took her back home, it was one of the hardest things I've ever done.
We told her that we are going to do our best, to get her permanently residing at our house, but we just don't know where to start?
Have any of you ladies been in a similar situation?
My partner has tried going through court for the rights, but as hes not on the birth cert there is only so far we can get 😐
Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated
5 Replies
I think you need to get a paternity test, I believe the courts can make this mandatory.
Once those tests come back and prove he's her biological father, getting custody etc will be an easier process.
You absolutely need to find a family lawyer. Years ago. A family lawyer can request the courts do a DNA test.
The longer you leave it, the worse it will look for your partner. So get on to it ASAP.
Get legal advice immediately and once the DNA test has been done you fight with all your might for his rights as a dad. This breaks my heart to read. I wish he had have done this years ago :-( It will be a fight and a half but his daughter needs him to help get her into a better living situation. Maybe if the mum is struggling the regular break might help her. Just be respectful and as long as it's all about the daughter he will not have trouble getting access. Wish you the best of luck.
It sounds like you've been dragged into a whole lot of drama and are expected to 'fix' the problems he created. I see RED FLAGS everywhere within your / his story.
the language used in this letter screams the person who wrote it feels 'entitled' and is covertly presenting herself and her partner as 'better than". Presenting the daughter as a "poor child", in turn attempting to have us believe the birth mother is "less than". the apparent 'father' (who's not been put on the birth certificate..... why is that?) playing the poor victim in all of this....