I left my husband last year (for very valid reasons that are not relevant to the question). I am in a new relationship. I am looking for hints and tips from other people who have started a relationship with children. My new man has an adult son. My children are all under the age of 13. So far he is getting along really well with my kids and we are getting along well together. I just wonder how much to include him in what the kids and I do together. I am also wondering how it works with discipline etc. So far he doesn't discipline my children (we have only been together for a couple of months and do not live together), but I am thinking of the future if this relationship does move to long term. He does back me up if I ask the kids to do something and they don't do it.
I am also concerned about intimacy. I have only ever slept with my ex-husband and I am feeling insecure about being intimate with another man (who has slept with more than one woman). I just worry about my lack of experience with men.
1 Replies
Don't worry about your perceived lack of experience. Having slept with a couple of women doesn't necessarily mean he is going to know a lot. Also every person is different in their likes and dislikes in the bedroom so it's going to be a learning process for both of you.
I would keep the disciplining in your hands. You need to show the kids that you are the defining person in their lives and don't need a man 'to back you up'. As he isn't living with you there is no reason for him to take discipline on. It's only been a few months so take it slow as far as involving him in your kids lives, make sure you still spend time with your kids without him.