Hi IM's
I'm a mum to a little boy. As any mother does, I want my son to grow up to be a man who respects women.
My question is how do you raise a boy to respect women in today's world? When women are so over sexualised in advertising, movies, TV and social media?
Thank you :)
4 Replies
Great question! As a single mum raising a boy, these are my guidelines. I'm not an expert but this is my starting point.
Firstly I'm mindful of the adults that are around my son. Boyfriends who have been less than absolutely respectful have been out on there arses. How I expect to be treated by men, and what I accept is very important. My son is watching.
Secondly I'm mindful of what media my son has access to. We don't have video clips on, we watch age appropriate TV. YouTube, iPads, TV etc are restricted to the lounge room, because if something innparproriate happens we have a discussion about it on the spot. That's not meant as a telling off, it's just a discussion about what was seen and heard and wether we should treat people that way. We are especially careful with YouTube. Some very innocent looking videos have some horrific, violent, mysogonistic messages. One that I caught my nephew watching was puppets discussing rape! As my son gets older of course these rules have been
Thirdly, housework and chores. My son participates in housework and chores, I am not a slave, and there are no girls and boys jobs, just stuff that needs doing.
Fourth, I don't talk about anyone in sexual terms in front of my son. I don't say someone is hot etc. I don't talk about my friends clothes or how pretty they are. We discuss what people do, what they do for work, is that interesting, if they are funny etc. we value personality.
Also depending on the age of your child certain conversations in regards to sex, porn etc, consent are super important.
Hello, different poster here. How old is your son?
My son is 3 and I feel I'm doing really well, but I'm worried for what's to come. Sounds like your doing amazingly well!!
He is actually an adult now, but his normal development was railroaded in his teens due a rare disorder. So although I hope everything I did has turned him into a lovely young man, he kind of skipped through some of the worst years where peers could have really influenced him. So I wouldn't want to comment beyond what's my thought process and discussions and theories I adhered to.
I took my teen sons to see Embrace recently.
The way I see it - It's all about respect for yourself first and then others, equality and equity. Model it, demonstrate it, show it, discuss it. Challenge the patriarchal views most of us have all been raised on, most of its so subtle, you almost miss it, the mainstream media is full of it. Call BS on things when you see it/hear it like sexist jokes, don't smile along and cringe on the inside any longer ??
I have faith in the next generation.