Husband health concerns.
I'm wanting advice on my partner. Mainly him taking care of himself and caring about what he eats, if he exercise etc
He isn't overweight at all but I'm concerned about his health. He is 32 and quit smoking about 12 months ago after smoking for about 20 odd years so that's a huge achievement. But he eats terribly. If I make something healthy for dinner that fine, he eats it. But when it comes to any other meal, no way, it's complete junk. And if he has to prepare his own meals he chooses badly. Fast food is his weakness and definitely portion control. I know typically men eat bigger meals but it's shocking the amount of food he can put away. He almost finds it funny and shows off about shoving massive bites in his mouth.
He also consumes a lot of soft drink, coke in particular. I would say he easily has 3 litres a day. He wakes up in the morning and the first thing he does is have a drink of coke.
It makes me want to scream!
He lays in bed after dinner and eats a bag of lollies or a bag of chips, just as an after dinner snack.
He doesn't exercise at all. I myself get up 6 mornings a week to do classes, and he has ample time to exercise himself too.
As you can imagine, I'm concerned about the damage on his body that his diet is doing.
And to put it simply, he doesn't care. He says he knows it's unhealthy but he doesn't want to change it. It constantly feels like I'm a nagging cow because I try to educate him on making better choices. He fails to see I'm just scared it will affect his health to the point of sending him to an early grave!
We have 5 kids between us and he is setting a terrible example for them! And he's a hypocrite and he tells them they must eat healthy but refuses to practice what he preaches.
I just don't know what to do to get through to him. I'm at the end of my tether on ways to help him see reason and be realistic about his future!!
4 Replies
I'm sorry to say you may have to back off. Having someone tell you what your doing wrong just makes you want to do it more. I'm sure he knows the risks (it's pretty hard not to know). He is an adult and has to decide when or if he will do this himself. While you keep trying to change him he will just dig his heels in.
It is probably time to back off. You can't make someone change if they don't want to and nagging could very well make them dig their heels in further. He is eating a least one healthy meal a day according to what you have said and he may just think that's good enough. Don't push your lifestyle onto someone else unless they ask for help or advice, you just need to keep doing your thing and you will probably notice he will start to make little changes on his own. It's hard to watch someone we love doing something that we know isn't good for them but if they were like that when you met them then you need to accept it like you used to accept it.
I agree with the other comments.. Nagging him will just make him want it more. Everyone has that one thing that they do or want even though it's no good for them..
Can you pack his lunches? I know it can be an extra hassel, but might help. As for exercising, how old are your kids? Can you go for walks of an afternoon as a family? Take them to the park with a footy or soccer ball and run around like crazy. Don't let him know you're doing it to make him get some exercise, just say you want to have some family fun. Even if you only do it a couple of times a week.. It's better than him doing nothing.
Who does the shopping and buys him the "after dinner snacks"? If it's yourself, stop buying them. I'm guessing you aren't the one that buys him his junk though lol
Also, if you go to the doctor as a family and get a health check up, if he is pretty unhealthy, hearing it from a doctor may help.
I have a similar problem. I'm angry he's so selfish and he acts like nothing bad will ever happen. Mine still smokes.