So tonight is the first night I've gone out and hung with friends in a very long time.
I've been out of a 7 year domestic violence relationship for a few years now and I haven't felt like I've had such a good time in a long time.
I lost all my friends. I don't really know when or how but they just weren't there anymore. I lost me and forgot what it was like to have fun.
Well finally after a long struggle I caught up with a friend and her family and it was amazing. Laughs fun and feeling happy! I've been friends with this friend for a very very long time and her family was always like another family.
I feel like maybe things will start to get better. This year so many things have started to get better and I feel like I can start to breath again.
The hard road isn't over and I still have set backs but I feel like I can start to breath again and try to move forward in life.
Am I being too hopeful? I'm always so worried that he'll do something to bring me back down again. I lived in fear and walked on eggshells daily and I still worry that maybe I shouldn't be so hopeful. I'm trying to not let things get to me for the sake of my daughter but sometimes I think it can't be this good and am waiting for his next blow.
2 Replies
It's fantastic that you enjoyed yourself. You should keep enjoying yourself because enjoying yourself fills your emotional bucket, it gives you strength. You shouldn't put life on hold because your ex might do something. But you can have a fantastic time and then if he does do some dick move you will be able to deal with it from a place of strength and you'll be able to bounce back quickly because you know life can be joyful and he can't get to you.
But chances are nothing will happen except you have a great life.
It can actually be this good and you should shoot for the stars kiddo :-) I have been out for nearly 3.5 years and am the same. Take time to smell the roses that you didn't notice all those years. Life is worth living and only you can allow him to control you. Good on you for expecting better for yourself :-)