Hi mums, I need some compassionate, judgement free help.
I have been seeing my new partner for only 4 months and have just found out I'm pregnant (massive guilt for not being careful enough). After my second child I got the "I'm finished" feeling, I'm young, but just know I don't want more kids, ever; one massive factor in my current situation is financial. I cannot afford a third child, it would be ridicously irresponsible and unfair on my other children if I went ahead with the pregnancy.
I have told my partner and he says at the end it is my decision, but overall wants to keep it, which concerns me about future resentment with it being such a new relationship (I really don't know him yet!)
I'm needing to know about costs, methods, side effects, where i go to get started etc. any advice really. I'm terrified but I know I'll be ok, it's for the sake of the children I already have.
Abortion
Abortion
Posted in:
Pregnancy
7 Replies
Take his feelings out of it. It is a new relationship and let's face it, the person who is most likely to get left holding a baby is the woman. Also relationships that have babies brought into it too soon are not likely to work out anyway.
But which ever way you go, you probably need to be clear with him that you don't want more children (if you are in fact done) because he deserves to know that, if he wants more children.
As to organising an abortion it depends on what state you are in. Could you edit your post? Different states have different rules/laws/services.
You can google abortion and your state. Otherwise talk to your GP.
As to wether you have a medical or surgical it depends on how far along you are and your personal preferences.
Oh lovely hugs. I was in a very similar situation. I fell the first month 3rd child and thought i was done. At the time i also had some serious medical issues that needed to be operated on. I knew deep down in my heart that i for various reasons including health, finanical and emotional i could not go through with the pregnacy at that time in my life. I firstly saw my gp who did my referral. I then had a 3 hr drive to the clinic where i had counsilling and I was put to sleep. The father of the pregnacy said he would support me no matter what i chose and 13 yrs and 10 years of marriage later I have no doubts he would have BUT i honestly do not think we would have lasted. I sometimes wonder what could have been but I remind myself of the situation I was in at the time and I know I made the right choice for myself, my 2 other children and my now husband.
im saying this without judgement, there are other options besides abortion, you could adopt the baby out if you really dont want the baby, what ever you decide i think counselling would help you and wish you the best of luck in your decision
There are sI many couples unable to have kids . Why not adopt your child out to those who can't instead have kids ???
I would consider medical abortion if you've made your decision. It is much less intrusive than surgical if you are fairly early days. I've never used it but I know a gp who wondered why fewer women go down this route. One option is to talk to a women's counselling service in your state as I think most have a range of options to refer you to local clinics. Or women's hospitals often have a discrete service. All should offer telephone support. Even though you sound clear, you might have some grief or confusion as your partner has a different feeling. Good luck and don't be too worried. Women have fought for the right for safe abortions for years and I'm glad you have a real choice. Hugz.
The cost will depend on where you live. This will also determine if you need a referral from a GP or not. I had a termination recently in Brisbane at Dr Marie Bowen Hills. Depending on how far along you are you can have a surgical or medical abortion (they even do medical over the phone if you don't have access to a clinic) Costs will vary everywhere but you can expect around $500. I'd recommended surgical over medical. They only use a twilight sedation now so the recovery is quick. The pain is like a bad period and bleeding can last up to a couple weeks.
You do not need a GP referral to go to Dr Marie. Emotionally I felt nothing but relief when I woke up. Best of luck
Hi, ive had an abortion. My son was only 2 months old at the time and I knew it was the right thing to do. I have never regretted it, not once. Im not saying you should have an abortion but I am saying that not everyone who has one regrets it. I have a 2 month old now and a 7 year old and Im very happy. Good luck mumma X