My 4 yr old son touched a girls vagina today at the playground...what would you have done about it????
My 4 yr old son touched a girls vagina today at the playground...what would you have done about it????
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8 Replies
I should add...he did it a few times.
There's a post a little bit down the page about a 6 year old boy inappropriately touching a little girl with some great advice about kids being curious. The post is a bit of a different situation about the parents.
I'd suggest reading that as there's some excellent advice and reading on there about kids.
Me personally I'd start with just telling him about "you can't touch other people's bodies and no one can touch you, especially in these areas".
I quiz my 4 year old on a daily basis in the bath (sounds silly I know) but he washes his bottom and penis himself. I always ask him "where can mummy touch you to wash you?" And he'll always say his face/head, arms, belly and chest and his legs and tells me he has to wash his "doodle and bum bum" himself because they're his private areas. It's also the same with other people, he knows he can cuddle me and dad, but he isn't to touch breasts and/or vaginas and penis'.
But he is only 4. He will be curious as he has a doodle, and this little girl had something different.
Children touch each other where they shouldn't touch. I would have told him to stop, and stayed very close to make sure he didn't do it again. If he did it again I would have removed him from the situation.
It's perfectly normal for kids to be curious about other children's bodies. But it's up to us to teach our children that it's not ok to touch another child's private parts. That being said, kids WILL do some things they've been told not to, because all kids get into mischief, it's the nature of children.
When I was around 6 my male next door neighbor and I thought it was great fun to sniff each other's bottoms. I know, what were we thinking!!!!
I have strict rules in my house about children in baths etc, I won't leave children in a bath together so I can supervise interactions and teach them about what isn't ok. Same as when we have a play date the kids have to play in the loungeroom or outside where I can see them.
He touched her vagina or her vulva? Bit of a difference
He knows not to touch others privates and no one touches his. He touched on top of her undies not underneath.
I agree with above comment. One firm reminder, you dont touch people there that little girl doesnt want you to and her mum will get very cranky. If you do it again we wont be able to stay. And stay close to steer him away from getting close enough. Or just move him far away.
It's age appropriate to be inquisitive. But here's some great resources to teach your child about appropriate touching. For your his safety and others :-) please don't think I'm thinking he's done anything wrong. These are just a few good sites that you can use. To teach him what is ok, for himself and others :-)
http://www.ahaparenting.com/parenting-tools/safety/prevent-sex-abuse-edu...
https://maggiedent.com/blog/top-tips-resources-teach-children-body-safet...
http://www.drgreene.com/perspectives/do-your-children-have-body-safety-r...
I had a boy do this to my son. It's important to figure out in these situations if it was accidental, innocent exploration or the possibility the child is being abused. It sounds like this is the second one for your son. He just doesn't know that's not ok to do. My son randomly draggef the back of his hand along the side of a girl a year older then him from shoulder to hip. That was his way of admiring how pretty she or her dress was but I clearly explained to him not to touch someone like that without permission and he didn't do it again. It is possible your son did it by accident because he didn't realise where he was touching. Probably pointing out something on her clothes