Very sensitive matter.
I'm currently entering my second trimester with baby number 3. My partner (who isn't my previous children's father) doesn't want the baby at all, he said he'd leave me if I choose to have the baby. There's nothing I can do to change his mind! I'm so destroyed because I'm in my late 30s and I need for nothing. I have a home.. I have a vehicle. I'm independent, but it's not good enough for him. He has children from a previous marriage and doesn't want to upset their apple cart.
I'm booked in for an abortion tomorrow! Advice.. Please!
15 Replies
It sounds like you want this baby. It's not too late to change your mind. I hope you have peace with your decision xx
Don't do anything if you aren't sure!!! Really think, how will you feel if you go through with it???
Take some time to be sure.
It sounds like you may resent your partner if you go through with an abortion as it sounds like you are almost being forced into it. For some people this may end a relationship. A child is forever. Just something to think about xx
He is obviously not the right guy for you. If he was willing to have unprotected sex with you he knew the risks! The risks are you would get pregnant. Abortion is not a form of contraception!! If you want this baby keep it, do not have an abortion because he wants you to. He will probably leave you either way. Weather you keep it or abort it, it sounds like you will resent him for it and your relationship won't last anyway. Having anger towards a person is no good for any relationship. You may never get over being forced into something you didn't want to do. In the end it's your choice!!
Even if you agree to go ahead with the termination, end your relationship with this man. You call him your partner but this has proven he really isn't.
I personally wouldn't abort I had one 4 days ago and regret it.
Read what you just wrote!!!!
"He'd LEAVE" if I had the baby.
A man who LOVES you, would not make you choose between them and a baby.
Do NOT have the abortion if you want this child.
Do NOT have an abortion just to please a man.
Have an abortion if you are 100% happy with not bringing another baby in to this world.
Relationship is over no matter what you choose to do. Do what feels right for you! And tell the man to piss off!
My sister fell pregnant to a guy she had been seeing for 6 months. They both knew they were having unprotected sex. He told her to get an abortion or he would leave. if she kept the baby it would ruin his life (mind you he was almost 40!), she was a horrible person for wanting to keep it etc. In the end she had an abortion but 8 months later regrets it so much. The relationship did not last much longer after the abortion. Why dont you see a counsellor first before going ahead? Sounds like you are very unsure. good luck
If you have an abortion, your relationship won't last. I've seen it time and time again.
I feel that he only wants you to have an abortion because deep down he knows he's going to leave you. And doesn't want responsibility for this child.
Only have the abortion if YOU don't want this child.
Please let us know how you go.
We're here to support you if you need it.
I know my relationship is over. As I sit here in the waiting room of the woman's hospital, a penny has dropped that no matter what I decide to do about the pregnancy.. He needs to go. Today is a preoperative appointment. Where they prod and poke you.. I'm so scared..
Oh mumma.
I wish I could give you a hug.
Only go ahead with this if you don't want this baby.
You can cancel your appointment if need be.
All the best with your decision.
You are STRONG! You are mature, have a house and a car. You can do this alone if you need to. We are thinking of you today mumma xx
I have been thinking of you all day - and wondering if you are okay. Please let us know how you are if you feel up to it xx
Kelly here from The Imperfect Mum team - and I haven't scheduled your question as I'm waiting for an update. Please message the page via PM and let me know if you need me to urgently post something.
Big hgus x