Mother of 1. Mid 20's, 162cm and 75 kgs. I have Endometriosis and Poly cystic ovarian syndrome. Unfaithful husband (we are still together. Ive forgiven him, but forgeting it is hard) My self esteem is so low. I just want to feel good about myself. I dont want to avoid looking at myself in the mirror. I dont want to dread going out in public, having to buy new clothes (because they all look disgusting ) i want to lose this damn weight and be ME. I have had a massive overhaul in my life style. I eat 3 very well balanced meals a day, ive cut out all my naughty treats. I ONLY drink water now. I Limit my carbs, very minimal sugars, good fats. I am active every single day. If i dont go for a 1 hur walk, i jog 3km, and take the dog for a 30min walk. I do oter home exercises. But this weight won't go. I cant afford any special meal replacements, subscriptions, gym memberships, pts, dieticians etc. I have to do it all from home. And make it my lifestyle. please help. I hate myself.
Stuck in An ugly fat confronting rut. How do i lose weight and feel good again? I dont want to hate myself any more.
Stuck in An ugly fat confronting rut. How do i lose weight and feel good again? I dont want to hate myself any more.
Posted in:
Self Care
9 Replies
Firstly, trying to loose weight while you hate yourself is like punishing yourself! Stop it! If you want to live an active healthy life, stop punishing yourself. Do it because you love yourself!
You will be surprised what you can afford regarding dietetians and exercise physiologists etc. Speak to your GP. Many of these things are available for FREE on an allied health care plan. Especially if you have something like PCOS. A couple of appointments may be all you need.
I suspect a lot of how you are feeling has more to do with your asshole husband. I think you are blaming you for what HE did. What he did had nothing to do with your weight/size. It's all on him. You both need to get some counselling for you both to sort this shit out. If he he won't go, kick him out. You deserve better! Treat yourself like a queen who deseves better and you will feel better!
As to weight, be careful when focusing on the number on a scale. When we start exercising and changing our eating our body can change in a number of ways and that's not always reflected in the number on the scale. For example I've only lost 8kgs but I've dropped 4 dress sizes! If I'd been focusing on the scale I'd have given up long ago. Plus I just feel better for eating healthier. I a, just so proud of myself that I can run further, walk further, lift heavier than I could do a year and a half ago!
But please above all be incredibly kind to yourself, you deserve to love your body, and yourself at 75kgs or 100kgs. You deserve to feel good about yourself and you deserve a partner who will love you, and treat you like the queen you truly are. You deserve a chat to your GP about those services I mentioned above and you deserve some counselling to help you work through everything. Xxx
In my experience my weight has never shifted while im depressed. Whether its due to my body, mind or perhaps im not doing enough or hard enough or sticking to it or enjoying it... i dont know but i know that frustration of it just not shifting.
Oh birth control affected it too.
But then, i can join a few fun classes, do some swimming, not lose much but suddenly be feeling much better about myself, my direction, my happiness, my self image.
Its largely mental. My advice is to focus on getting happy. Find things that make you feel good, even laugh and smile while youre doing it.
Thanks for the kind words. I WAS feeling great. Every day that 1 hour i leave the house is all about me. But jumping on and seeing i hadnt lost but gained weight, was a big hit to the face! I am not on any birth control, i cant have any more children.
I think you mightneed to start by loving yourself the way you are. Buy clothes that you rock. Spend money on perfume and nice soap. And shoes. Youre worth it and you need it.
Keep taking that hour for you.
I agree with first poster i think your husband has a lot to do with your low self esteem. Nohody deserves to live feeling this bad about themself. You might find youll start to recover without him, and if thats the case, you deserve nothing less.
I think you need to work on your self confidence hun.
I'm 165cm and 75kgs wearing a size 10/12 and feel the best I ever have.
I have no trouble finding clothes that fit and look great
I would be feeling horrible too if my partner cheated. It's great you are trying to move forward but not if its affected your self confidence this much
I'd KILL to be 75kgs. Or even 85kg lol. I think your confidence is more the issue here. I'm sure you look absolutely great, you're obviously healthy and fit, you need to be happy with how you are now or you'll regret it soon enough.
Have you heard of the healthy mummy?? Give it a look and try all the free recipes. https://www.healthymummy.com/?lbwref=113
WoW, youre not fat, you're not even in the obese range. Wish I was your weight instead of being a super fat ugly lard arse at 102 kilos and 166cm tall, I also have PCOS. I actually don't think those things about myself just so you know, I'm loosing weight slowly, have a boyfriend that loves and adores me and accepts me and always has the only reason I can loose weight is because I'm doing it for me and I'm still loving myself. I think you may need to see a counsellor and get some help with your self image. Sure you do have a little extra weight, with a bit of hard work you can loose it. Cut out alcohol, sugars, sodas/soft drinks. Eat more fruits and chuck in a little more exercise. Six small meals a day is better than 3 larger ones. Good luck and remember to love yourself!!
I am a size 14 - 16. Back 7 years ago i was about 56 kgs. Obviously after pregnancy my body changed, but i just want to sit at about 60kgs. I want to look health and good. I have a muffin top, belly rolls, flappy arms a double chin and thick thighs. I definitely dont look any better than i feel. I suffer acne and scaring too, and the few kg i have managed to lose, im almost certain went straight from my boobs. They are tiny and empty now ?
I dont drink alcohol, smoke or take and drugs. ( I am on antibiotics for cystic achne , another blow to the self confidence ?) i used to have 3+ coffee's a day. Now im lucky to have one a day. Other than that i only drink water, making sure i dink 2L minimum. I have cut down on bread ( 4 slices of wholemeal over a fortnight, if that) i dont eat pasta any more..... no lollies or chocolate. I make sure i have 3 meals a day and 2 little snacks in between. Try to eat as clean as possible, so mainly meat (lean cut) fruit and veg. Some cheese, yogurt and milk, i aim for the healthier option available. Oats, boiled, eggs, tuna...... im trying my best. I will definitely be making an appointment to see my Gp and see what advice he can offer. Thanks again ladies. It means alot xx