I hate my partner.... i haven't been feeling anything for him for quite some time and we fight daily.
Im trying to move out for our daughters sake... i do not want her growing up like this, she deserves better.
2 nights ago she rolled off the bed (I know i shouldn't co-sleep) and before she had even finished crying my partner was blaming me saying i should've been watching her better. (I was asleep with her, my partner sleeps in the lounge room)
We then got into an argument because ive been asking for the mattress to just be on the ground to prevent this but he thought that was trashy.... he then smashed my phone (again) and hit me but only on my shoulder repeatedly.
So going on yesterday he went on a rampage about how lazy i am because i dont help with painting and house renos and maintain the garden....
In my defense i cook whole meals 3 times a bloody day, washing, folding, dishes, and mop and sweep floors daily, he has crazy high standards and i always mantain the house too that stranded.
Im also always doing stuff with my daughter eg, reading, park and that sorta stuff.
He hasnt changed a nappie or given her a bath since she was a week old! Bloody hell he hasnt even washed the dishes or done any cleaning in the last bloody year!
I just myself for going back to him. I hate being called lazy when i try so hard.
I know he only stays with me so he can see our daughter buy he doesnt even spend time with her! He avoids watching her for even 10 minutes!
Im currently at my parents and plan on staying here... i really hope i don't go back. I hate him, i really do.
This morning he spat in my bloody coffee because i didn't make him breakfast... i was running so late and had 101 things to do.
Sorry about this being so long and probably not making sense i just NEEDED a rant and to get all this off my chest.
Of course i no longer have any friends to talk to because of him... he is such a pig.
11 Replies
Babe, you're not in a shitty relationship, you're in an abusive one!! I think you need to call1800 respect which are a domestic violence service and you need to stay at your parents! Please dont go back, you and your daughter deserve so much better. And just because he only punched you on the shoulder it doesnt make it any less wrong. No one has the right to hit you!!
Do not go back! Hit you? Spat in your coffee? Big red flag. Big deal breakers! Talk to your parents, get their support. Stay away from him and start again. Channel this angry energy into productive energy. Make a plan and stick to your guns. You can do this.
Abusive relationship!!!!
Please don't go back.
Please see your GP and start getting some counselling ASAP so you don't fall into the trap of returning to the relationship. It's really important.
This has happened before and i always go back. I am so over it!
Ive made up mine and my daughter room, hopefully this is it!
He just sent me this trying to explain himself... i was holding out daughter when he threw the rolls and when he spat in my coffe i was with her aswell. He is full of excuses.
"Threw rolls at the wall coz u wouldn't answer when i said u might as well take these. Spat in your coffee coz i asked you to watch her and as you walked in i walked out. And then u went off at me for not watching her? Your fuckd in the head. And you should appreciate the fact i hold myself back from doing stupid shit and spat in your coffee instead. Oh and sorry i hot your arm. Fukn sook"
Please get some counselling so you can stay strong and break the cycle
Im booking a doctors appointment now.
Thank you and good luck
Evidence. DO NOT DELETE. You need to go to police. You need them to apply for an AVO. I hope you are strong enough to stay away from him, but if you do decide to give it another try at least you will have some protection.
What would your advice be to your daughter if she grows up and is in a similar relationship?
That's your answer there.
By staying you are teaching her that this is how we should be treated
Actions speak louder than words.
You can stay and tell her to expect more and not accept bad treatment but if that's what she's seen then it's what she'll accept.
Be strong hun, if not for you then do it for her.
There are so many services that can help you, you don't have to go back!
Get on the phone and start looking and moving forward
Yes that is shitty. Don't go back! Do you go back because you're lonely? His excuses are bullshit they show he has a reason that makes this acceptable in his world.
His promises are bullshit, see the first point to know he'll do it again, guaranteed.
I can only assume youre lonely. You're lonely because of him. Go back to him and stay lonely, or move forward and make friends that are valuable and build you up, make your life what you know it should be.
Imagine that life and go for it. Do it for your daughter. Just cut contact with him if you know youre weak and he works on (as they do at this point. It's nothing new and nothing will change, except your life passing and your daughter growing up.
Wow I hope you don't go back either, you and your daughter deserve better, much better... As for the co-sleeping thing, if it works for you then that's ok... Push the bed against the wall and put your daughter on the side near the wall and you on the other side this will stop her rolling off the bed :)