My best friend deleted me from Facebook
A few months ago my best friend and I had a falling out over her doubling booking plans. She had doubled booked and I felt let down that she had not cancelled the other plans, so I told her not to worry about it. A couple of days later she sent me a message saying that she was not going to play these games and there is something really wrong with me if I can't communicate. I explained I was hurt as I spent the 3 days before preparing my time to spend together. I said that in future if we could both be mindful of not double booking that would help.
Again i get a message back telling me I'm playing games and can't cummunicate.
Over the last couple of months I have seen her once and spoke a couple of times over the phone.
This week I notice on face book she has un- friended me. I sent her message asking her is that a hint of not wanting to be friends anymore.
She replied she didn't do it I must have. I know I didn't do it and told her that. She continued on that I did. I then asked her does she want to meet and talk about us or leave things the way they are. She replies leave them she has nothing to talk about.
After 14 years of being best friends I am upset and hurt. But I feel there is nothing more to say to change it. She has made up her mind.
The issue is we will be seeing each other with mutual friends soon.
What do I do or say when we are around our other friends? I don't want people to feel uncomfortable. As they don't yet know what has happened?
6 Replies
Don't say anything, if they need to know they'll ask.
I would say she is actually the one who can't communicate!
Sounds like she is the one playing the games!
Sounds like she is the one playing the games!
Could you be a bit passive aggressive? You said it's ok don't worry but then still made jabs about it. I know I'd be a little pissed off if you reminded me not be mindful not to double book in future.
Just an idea.
When.you see her in public say hi and Ask a general question about her kids/ the weather, break the ice and be the bigger person.
It's a fact of life that sometimes we take a backseat to other things in our friends lives. I would be mortified if I had made plans at the same time as I was supposed to be doing something with my best friend (with visits currently 12-18 months apart it's unlikely though due to the military like planning that goes into catch ups) but if worst came to worst I certainly wouldn't want to be made to feel like crap about it. In your position (and knowing how much I love my bestie) I'd apologise, say you're sorry and you miss her, you were hurt but that you know in hindsight you could have handled it much better.