Hi everyone
I am currently 26 weeks pregnant and also have a 1 year old son. My partner is a good dad in the sense he loves playing with our son and our son adores him.
Usually he is pretty good with helping out but the last couple of months he has slackened right off.
He used to get up to our son every second morning, and now he wont at all. He stays up very late at night and sleeps til lunchtime nearly everyday. He drinks alcohol like its nothing and its beginning to become a problem (for me) as he only works casual at a restaurant and i do not work and only receive centrelink... We pay $400 a week rent so we have barely any money left after bills. I pay all bills, he only pays his hlf of rent and even complains about that, and it doesnt bother him if he spends some of his rent money, because he thinks I'll just put in the rest of the money. And i do because i have no choice. Its really getting to me. He doesnt take me seriously when i talk to him about budgeting etc.
All he worries about is alcohol and cigarettes.
Im highly emotional and hormonal and i dont know what to do anymore, im exhausted from looking after my son and being pregnant is taking it out of me, especially with no help.
I cry everyday because i am always stressed about money and coping with two children with no help.
Please someone tell me theyve been in a similar position and give me some advice. I need it...
Unhappy with partner
Unhappy with partner
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Pregnancy, Money
6 Replies
Wouldn't it be nicer to get parenting payment single, and not have to stress about where the money is going to come from to pay your bills?? Isn't it less stressful not having to deal with a lazy ass partner with an alcohol problem who takes advantage of you financially??
I usually say that you shouldn't make such a big life decision when you're pregnant, but it sounds like you should leave. Even if it's just temporary until he gets some help.
Alcohol abuse will end up affecting your son's health and safety. He deserves to have two safe, loving parents.
Has he always had an issue with alcohol or is this a new development? Is there an underlying reason for him drinking so much?
Encourage him to seek help for the alcohol because you're concerned not only about his safety, but the safety of the children.
Also, he needs to pay for his share of the bills.
I don't mean 50/50, though. I mean the same percentage of both of your income goes towards bills. That way, you both have the same amount of spending money afterwards.
Ask if he'd be willing to go and speak to a counselor or to a doctor to seek help for his alcohol abuse.
But if he isn't willing to change, you need to speak to a professional that can help you make the correct decision without your hormones influencing your choice.
He sounds like a deadbeat! Don't settle for anything less then you deserve.
He will treat you the way you allow yourself to be treated. If he doesn't have all his rent money make him sell his shit! If he's not putting in for groceries he doesn't eat - you catch my drift? It appears he brings absolutely zero to the table and still expects to be king of the castle.
I try do that. Its not like i can lock the pantry.. I cant stop him from eating.
And he doesnt, he thinks im a joke he doesnt tske anything i say seriously.
Kick him out or leave! This isn't a partner it's a user!!