Hi mums,
So i find my house is always a mess. The days the kids arent home i never want to do anything as i just want to enjoy the peace and chill out, im always stressed out over kids fighting and feel like as soon as i clean something its the same 2 minutes later... anyway tonight hubby mDe a passing comment about 1 of his work mates house always being immaculate, he didnt mean anything by it but it makes me wonder and i the only one that sucks at being a housewife, i should also add i have 3 kids and dont work often
Am i the only shit housewife
Am i the only shit housewife
Posted in:
Parenthood Guilt
18 Replies
Haha nope. Me too! I can't participate in any mum chatter about daily and weekly cleaning routines and rosters and how you clean your walls or curtains, I don't think I have, ever.
BUT I'm not a shit mum! I bet you're not either.
Thanks lol.... unfortunately though i feel like a shit mum too. All i ever read about is how others take there kids to the park etc and i never do, they are always fighting and naughty so i never want to do those things, or when i do, they want to no whats next i feel its never good enough for them
Oh I get you. Well, one time I used to hate spending the whole weekend with my kids, I really struggled, and they're gems I just didn't have the energy to put into doing it for all that time without a break, anyway, I was told, why am I putting the pressure on myself to do these things? Why am I creating the guilt? Its ok to accept there's some things you don't do, and a great idea to get someone else to do it with your kids so it's win win all round, then the time you spend together is quality, instead of lots of tired resentful angry half-present time.
So for example, book swimming lessons in so they're busy and youre free.
It sounds like you're a bit burnt out at the moment and need to find more time for yourself before you could give anymore to anyone else, kids or house work.
Oh another little trick I was told was to have something to look forward to. So an exercise class or art class etc, or a hot chocolate, glass of wine, chat with a friend, these kinds of things help you get through a hard day, so it's nto just day after day of the same thing endlessly.
Well that turned out long, sorry, but I hope it might help in some way. It's ok to admit you don't want to be with your kids and you enjoy doing other things. It's great to actually get out and do those things! Happy you will be a happy mum. Xx
kids get bored very quickly, so if they are always fighting and naughty its because their just stuck at home too much... And when you do take them to the park and they ask whats next - you say home, they will then keep playing at the park so they don't have to go home too quickly. Don't feel like its never good enough for them, thats just kids, always wanting to know what's next. With my kids I tell them the plans for the day so they know. First everyone has to clean their room if thats done, we can go for a bike ride, then back home for lunch. If you play nicely then I will take you to the park in the afternoon. Well thats what works for me. And if they are naughty, well then they have to read in their bedrooms - no imacs or ipads for the day.
Hell No! My house is sometimes immaculate but only when I've behaved like an insane person because I've invited people around for party or something. But that's only once maybe twice a year!!!
Most of the time there are dishes in the sink and the floor looks like it needs a sweep and a mop! There are far more interesting things to do than keep a spotless house.
I do clean the walls once a year probably lol
My sister has a mostly spotless house (no house is spotless all the time) but she has a cleaner, window cleaner, gardener and an incredibly supportive tidy husband. If I had all those things my house would be spotless mostly too!
No you arent the only one... lol. My house looks like im loosing a game of jumanji lol
i have a 2.5yr old daughter and moved into our new home 1.5 yrs ago. I have cleaned my oven once in that time lol! it is so hard to keep on top of things & you are definitely not alone!
Nope!!! I'm a terrible housewife! I have 2 kids full time, 1 step-daughter part time and 4 cats. I feel
Like my house is always in turmoil and the partner just says "well clean it then" yeah like it happens magically ?
My house is only spotless when I'm expecting company! Which is thankfully rare. ?
I thought most mums were the same... oops. Might need to up my game then, haha.
I'm a single mum and I hate house work lol my house was only ever clean when my son was a infant and slept a lot
of course if the kids are at home playing every house always ends up in a mess. But how old are your children? do they not clean up their own mess - toys put away, clothes off the floor, dishes in the sink. All these small things do help a lot. I also do light cleaning when they are in bed for a quick 30mins, so when we wake up in the morning there is not too much to do in the morning.
The days I do get to myself, I clean for the first few hours, so then I know everything is done and then I can relax for the rest of the day - go for a run, watch movies or sleep.
My sister in law's house is like a show house and constantly talks about how much she has to clean. I have a daughter who trashes the place my boys when they stay here do the same. I clean to best of my ability when my daughter is at daycare. I used to want and think the house has to be perfect, but I stopped that way of thinking the day my sister in law came over and cleaned the toilet! Her mother (my mil) ripped into her and since then I don't care. The place is clean maybe cluttered but I'd rather live in a home rather than a show house. Don't be so hard on yourself :)
I am exactly the same, your not a shit housewife as long as your kids are happy and fed and are clothed don't stress enjoy your piece and quiet and do house work when you feel like it, don't think that you are a shit house wife cause your not your still doing an amazing job like all the other mums just cause your house is a mess doesn't make you a bad mum xx
Oh hell no! Last thing I feel like doing after coming home from work and dealing with dinner/homework/bedtime etc. is clean! I would much rather chill out on the couch with Miss 10 and a dvd than tackle the mess. Weekends, we get in and do it together but during the week the house often looks like a bomb has hit it.
Pfft! If you could see my house now you would feel like your house is immaculate! Are the kids fed? Loved? Wearing clean clothes (well they were clean when they put them on this morning...)? If so, I wouldn't give a stuff about the house. There are more important things in life than dusting the sills and scrubbing the walls. Make memories and have fun with your brood. When they are old enough get them to help with some of the chores (pack away toys, make beds, do dishes, washing in the machine, sweep/vaccume floors, cook a meal once a fortnight, etc) and work alongside them making memories together. It'll all work out eventually. Motherhood has enough guilt trips, don't take this one there will be others.
You can count me in too ;)
I work 4 days a week and have a young child and manage to keep the house clean. I dont have 3 kids though I imagine that would be alot harder! Sundays are our big clean up days (do a weeks worth of washing, vacuum, mop ect.) Then I just potter during the week, maybe give that a go. I dont think you are a shit house wife but I do think being able to be a house wife is a privilege. Each to their own. Good luck :-)