Looking for assistance.
I'm a single mother to a almost 11 year old girl.
I randomly check her ipod at times and have discovered alot of porn sites over numerous days. The history only goes back 5 days.
I'm also concerned about photos she has sent friends with cleavage shots. (not full nudity).
I'm feeling quite alone and want to deal with this correctly. I've always kept my dating away from her. She has been given puberty books and we have discussed it all, but I'm unsure where I've gone wrong. I'm feeling very unsure and want to approach this right. Any advice or similar situations would be appreciated.
6 Replies
Id be taking any and all devices away from her she's obviously too young for it to be taking pics like that and sending them to friends.
I would put blocks on certain websites etc and stop mms messaging on phones so she can't send pics that way. You can put filters on her emails also.
Change your wifi password and turn the wifi off her ipod / ipad. Discuss with her what she saw and why she is looking at it. Put in place parental controls to block these sites. Be as open and honest as you can with her, age appropriate.
I don't think you have done anything wrong. Please don't' think that. She is curious and has maybe heard other people talking about it. Dont make sex out to be dirty but explain to her there is a difference from porn to sex between people in relationships. She needs to feel comfortable to come to you. Try not to use an accusing tone of voice.
Good luck Mummy.
She's curious. She's 10. Buy her some how you began books with some pictures to explain stuff. If she was a boy people would think it was normal. She also might just be feeling sexual. We are al wired different. I watched my parents porn with my brother when I was 9. It was very tame back in my day though and I think kissing and dry humping was all we saw
My daughter did the same thing, they are curious I made sure sure she understood these are movies and are not real,explain to her how important having sex with the right person is,and how sex at first is not enjoyable it hurts.
I also looked up some sex ed video's and made her watch them and afterward's made her write 20 questions that she wanted answered, the key is don't get angry or she will not open up. be fully honest with her, find out what she knows tell her things that she dosn't, I did put net nanny on her Ipod so she could not look at these sites, there is also a few photoshop videos that show the kids what ppl look like before and after I found these good because it show's them alot of what they see isn't real. make sure she understands this is not how you want her to portray, how sex is ment to be.because it is far from it... You are not alone I did the same as you and posted on this site for help I had alot of ppl give good advice though I had quite alot of ppl judging me for it, these ppl are naive.it happens all the time but young minds are curious, when I asked my daughter why, she said she thought it was funny.... I did let her see me cry and let her know how upset i were, not at her but on the fact that she had watched something so wrong and acted out and that i didn't want her thinking of sex in that way...hope I helped a little if, you want to talk you can pm me...xxoo hugs to you..
I am a woman and I started watching porn at a very young age also, I think I was 10-11. I was just curious and went through puberty when I was very young. I naturally a very sexual person and was this way for as long as I can remember, I was already masturbating at 9 years old. For a girl this is a bit different but I don't think you would be as worried if it was a boy. I don't think it has damaged me I was aware that these women were;t "real" and I didn't become sexual with other people until I was ALOT older... I know this might be a little TMI i'm just trying to say I wouldn't be freaking out over it. Of course it is a concern especially if she is sending pictures online! When my mum found out she sat me down and couldn't understand why I was doing this, at first I denied it but then opened up and explained I just wanted to, I was curious and I enjoyed it. (I think she was also worried I had been sexual abused or something). She also explained to me that just because I was feeling these things I should not act on them with boys because you should wait until you're in love and married, I listened and took her advice. Unfortunately I was also taking pictures and sending them to boys, this was when I was about 14 ( my mum never knew, thank god ) But I worry to this day where these images have ended up. I would definitely sit down and explain to her the risks in sending photos online.